You may live in a world that seems far from your choosing.
You may believe that you have very little choice in life and definitely did not choose to be born.
The labour of an imminent birth is probably the first time that a being expresses its choice. It is not well known that the baby and not the mother starts the process of labour. Often at this point outside forces interfere trying to control and manipulate the situation, stealing away the choice from a child to decide the perfect time to be born. At this point we have little choice, little control, little power. Fortunately as we grow and develop in life the threads of our autonomy start to weave together through the fabric of our being, and as a result choice and power over our life grows and develops.
I’m sure if you took the time to look back you could find pivotal moments where a choice was handed over to you or one taken away. As you investigate it becomes apparent that these choices can have monumental, or in other cases, totally insignificant effects on your life. At times we may have felt controlled and powerless and at the whim of another. At other times we felt powerful and liberated by those two simple yet profound words
“I choose….”
The choices made on our behalf can be more for the benefit of the person choosing rather than the one affected by the choice.
“I want my son to have the opportunities that I never had” said the father concerning his son. Many years later the son tells me how he never wanted what his father never had but was not included in that decision.
The fact that you are reading this comes at the end of millions and millions of choices that you or others have made on your behave.
“See how powerful choice is?”
Many people look back critically at the choices of their past and say they would have done it better or different and if given the chance again would choose a different way. Unfortunately we cannot change the past but fortunately we can change the way that we relate to it. That is the choice we have!!! Finding compassion, self love and acceptance for the decisions and choices that we made in the past can not only release us from the hold that our past can have over us but also frees us to take a chance to choose again, knowing that if we do choose “badly” there is a way to resolve it.
Holding onto a judgment of self blame can be very damaging and eat away at us for a lifetime.
We may need help to find the choices that can lead us to healthy, peaceful and harmonious resolution of any particular episode from our past; allowing what was once a trauma to become no more than another memory.
We may also need help to see where we have choice today. Awareness of the choice is liberating, powerful and life enhancing. Understandably in some situations, choice can be daunting as I encountered shopping with my friends in a French supermarket. Standing at one end of the cheese counter the other end seemingly reaching out beyond infinity. Thankfully I was just along for the ride. What I later came to realise was that in the face of greater choice one just needed more information.
Going back to where one has choice is like hitting the reset button on life. Far to often we find ourselves at a place or situation where we feel powerless and out of control, impotent in our own life. As a result we start to fall down a negative spiral that builds more negativity along the way. The healthiest way to stop this is to ask that simple question again:
“Where do I have Choice?”
Look at the small things, awareness of that which we have choice over builds in the same way that a single brick on another eventually becomes a house.
Never underestimate the potential power of a simple choice.
We might take for granted the simple choice to go to the kitchen and pour a glass of water from the tap
10% of the world’s population doesn’t have access to turning on their own tap!!!
For then it is a luxury they only dream of. Bring it back to basics and in doing so you can start to regain your perspective and personal power. However small the choice seems to you it does not make it insignificant, as someone once said…
“If you don’t think that small things make a difference try sleeping with a mosquito.”
Many years ago I was working under my car attempting to fit a new gearbox in an unfortunate twist of events I found myself trapped under my car. My panic only made it worse as the realisation of my situation hit me. My whole body tensed and I started to find it hard to breathe. After what felt like minutes but was probably only seconds I realised that I needed to help myself relax as my tension was only making any chance of escape impossible. I looked out to see my left hand that was not under the car and was in fact free and able to move. As I focused on the movement of my hand my body started to relax and once again became flexible. As a result I was able to ease my way out from under the car.
Rejoice in the truth that we have a CHOICE and allow yourself to bathe in the realization that Choice is a cornerstone to living a healthy fulfilled life.
I ask myself to be compassionate with me for taking so long to find such an important Key. I did the best I could with what I had available at the time.
I choose to be gentle with myself…
What do you choose for yourself???